April 26, 2011

A Snake

Warning: This post is: Real and True.  No comic relief in here.  Lots of Spiritual realm stuff.  Deep.  Exposed.
Read at your own Risk.

We saw this snake on Saturday afternoon while we were walking the Greenway.  He was perched in this little bush letting his lunch digest and Bill spotted him.  He was right at eye-level.

An interesting wildlife spotting considering the events that occurred earlier that morning.  I woke up early (5am-ish) wide awake with my brain on overdrive.  My mind wouldn't stop reeling, I couldn't switch it off.  All I kept thinking was, "What's wrong with me?  Why is my body not doing what it is supposed to?  what have I done, or not done, that I should be doing to start labor?"  You see, just two days ago at our doctor appointment, I was dilated to 4cm and my cervix was plenty thin for labor to be starting.  The doctor even called into the doctor on call for the weekend to let them know I'd probably be coming in, that's how confident she was that we'd have this baby by Saturday at the latest.  

But it was Saturday morning and I had NO signs of active labor starting.  It was Saturday morning and my mom was flying into town that night.  We were running out of time.  Why wasn't my body working?  What is wrong with me?  There it is.  Can you hear it?  The snake.  Satan.  Creeping in again.  I knew it was him because thoughts like this would NOT come from God.  I am fearfully and wonderfully made in His likeness.  My body is perfectly capable of labor.  Nothing is wrong with me.  I haven't done anything wrong.  But Satan was trying again, to creep in.  And I despised him for it.  It made me so. Mad.  

I rolled over into my hubby's arms and asked if he was awake enough for me to tell him something.  Just thinking about telling him made me start to cry, tears of anger and frustration.  He realized what was happening and just held me while I got it all out, and when the time was right, asked what was going on.  I told him everything - the thoughts that had been running through my head and how Satan was trying to attack again.  I told him I hated that he was trying it again, just like he tried at the beginning, right before we conceived, and now he was creeping in again, before the birth.  He reassured me and comforted me and prayed with me.  And we lay there for a few hours, just relaxing, coming to terms with things, fighting off Satan with our prayers and our strength from God.  

Hubby even took the day off work, to be with me, and to prove to Satan that he wasn't going to let anything more happen to me.  We had an incredible day together, enjoyed our morning sleeping in and decided to go for a walk on the Greenway to get some exercise in on a beautiful sunny day.  

And that's when we saw it.  

The snake.  

And deep down inside I felt strong.  I felt victorious.  
That snake didn't scare me one bit.  So I took it's picture, standing feet away from him as he stared at me.  

And on the way back by later, after laughing and enjoying our time on the trail, the snake was gone.  Nowhere to be seen.  

No evidence that he had ever even been there. 

Take that Satan.  
We won.